Many of you know about my cousins’ journey through adoption. My cousin Jared and his wife Krystal have been traveling the road of adoption for quite a while now. A year ago, things came to a head – but not in a good way. A little girl they were just about to bring home from Ukraine (literally within the week) was whisked away from them and they haven’t seen or heard from her since.
Adoption has always been on our hearts, so we have been following their story very closely. When we heard what happened, I cried as if it had happened to us. My heart just ached for them and their very real loss. I could only imagine what Krystal, especially, was going through.
Now, it’s been a full year and they are just months away from now bringing home a little boy from the Caribbean. Krystal has started a blog, is writing a book, and now travels the States sharing their story.
Why do I share this with you? For one thing, I am so proud of Jared and Krystal and how they have used their pain to try to bring awareness and change to adoption policies. She’s become an advocate for the voiceless, nameless, parentless children of the world and I think that is absolutely awesome and if I didn’t have so much on my plate already, I’d join her!
Secondly, I’m sharing this because I know for a fact that it’s so easy for us, myself included, to blame God for the pain in our lives. If anyone had a reason to do so, they did. I found myself asking God that very question when I heard what happened to them – just wondering why God “allowed” this to happen to them. It’s so easy to have the first thing we do to be to turn on God when tragedy strikes. “Why, God? Why me? Why do bad things happen to good people? What did I do to deserve this? Where are You?” etc etc etc. We’ve all been there. We may have even been there this week.
Believe it or not, it is OKAY to cry out to God and be angry with God. If you read even 1/4 of the Psalms written by David, you can hear his frustration and even anger at God. Yet, you can also see how he reconciles himself with the fact that through the pain, God is still on His throne, He’s still in charge, and He’s big enough to handle our accusations. He is not the one at fault or to blame. He is the hope and reason for getting up and keeping going.
Instead of running from God screaming in anger, try running to God.. even if it’s screaming in anger. He is your only true hope for healing from immeasurable pain and brokenness. I have been reminded so often recently that truly the answer to every question, to every need is simply… Jesus.
I encourage – no, implore – you to check out Krystal’s new website and read through their journey. Start by clicking here and then read the rest of their story. Start at the beginning for it to make complete sense. Join Krystal in her desire to take care of the orphans of our world by sponsoring a child through Holt Int’l (all info on her blog). Have her come speak at your small group or women’s Bible study.
Above all, next time life throws something at you that is literally unbearable, take it the only One Who can bear every burden thrown His way. Even if throwing it at Him means you do it weeping on your bedroom floor out of sheer frustration and anger, that’s okay. He’ll gladly lift it from you and heal the wounds hidden deep in your heart. You just need to let Him.